they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
We have so much sex to catch up on
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
no dude he sent me cemetery flowers, i know it. they are half dried out roses in the shape of a cross, seriously. and he is not religious. so he robbed a freaking grave site for me. am i like an accessory to grave robbing now??
damnit this is what you get for dating guys with neck tattoos
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
Woke up this morning to him making out with me in his sleep, then I had to go on a scavenger hunt to find a used condom before my roommate got back... it was under my pillow.
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
Randomize
