it's too hot outside to masturbate.
It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
Randomize
