I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
I feel like tequila is Gods way of lighting my fuse to do something awesome
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
Pro: She likes to masturbate to 50 shades of grey. Con: She reads 50 Shades of grey non-ironically.
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
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