wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
True but thats because hes a fetus.
the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
Every time I type "should" my phone autocorrects to "shouldn't". even my phone knows my ideas are terrible.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
The poop emoji wasn't even in my recents. Does that mean I'm growing up?
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
Just remembered someone sprayed perfume in my mouth last night after convincing me it was vodka and that i tried to herd ducks around campus and bring one home.
Randomize