im gay
i know
yea but for you.
My pussy is not your playground.
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
Welp just ran into my high school history teacher while buying a pregnancy test...there goes my veil of innocence in this town.
This chick walked up to me in the bar and started making out with me, then grabbed my drink while I wasn't looking and walked off.
Randomize
