Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
Randomize
