You just made me feel so damn special
Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
You spent most of the night crying and throwing leftover meatballs at the neighbors dogs
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
Randomize
