I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
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