I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
Just had a nice conversation with my landlord while cleaning your puke off my car
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Shitty. Well if it makes you feel any better I just had a toothless wasted crackhead in my bar who was mad because there are TOO MANY FUCKIN TREES in Nantucket.
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
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