Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
you spent the rest of the night making a recipe for mixed drink called "the new years bowel remover". it has 13 parts but judging from the bold all caps, the boiled avocado is the most important
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Randomize
