Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
Randomize
