It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
just crush a couple of percocets into it. tell him sam adams came out with a new beer. flavored with sleep.
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
Remember how I made that resolution to remain celibate for 6 months? Well, I just broke that
You literally made that 4 hours ago...
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
Randomize
