fml, blew my nose and red sprinkles came out and did the splits when i sneezed
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
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