its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
I just opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a tube of mascara. Get on my level
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
You know you drink too much when the bartender at your favorite bar recognizes you at chipotle with your sunglasses on.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
Randomize
