Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
What happened to fro yo and sex?
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
Randomize
