and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
Drunk puking in my bathtub has plugged it up for the third time this year. I hate these calls to my landlord.
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
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