I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
So I'm looking through your google history on your laptop and you have 'is ketchup even remotely nutritious' and 'alcohol with fewest calories but highest alcohol'. What new fad diet are you on because I feel like we could do this together.
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
I'm pretty stoned, and for a second I forgot that I'm not actually Barbie and I was getting excited about all the fun we were going to have on my jet.
She shows up drunk at 3am for sex and then punches me straight in the eye in the middle of it because "you're too nice."
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
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