Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me
How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
He called me for phone sex. Do you know how hard it is to fake an orgasm, and play Candy Crush at the same time?
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
Randomize