Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
You said you brought chipotle into a movie and I asked you to marry me and you said yes
Nothing says "we're never gonna bone" like "nice haircut, it makes you look like my cousin"
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
How naked do you want me to be?
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
Randomize
