I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
I mean.. listen to "Put It In My Mouth" and you'll get the gist of my voicemail for you.
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
Your penis caused this!
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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