I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
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i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
I stopped understanding conversations unrelated to vodka two vodkas ago.
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
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My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
I have aggressive nipples.
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
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