I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Randomize
