so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
If you're funny as hell and have a mustache, odds are I'm probably gonna fuck you
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
Randomize
