lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
Found my wallet. It was under my dresser with a note that said "good job you found me". Drunk me is an ass.
the japanese bartender dressed as a cowboy in assless chaps just told me i was too drunk for another shot
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
There was a clear and well defined point last night where I could've decided to go home but no now I've woken up with glitter all over my nuts and potentially an std or 2
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
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