you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
I just caught my mom fingering herself in the bathroom...Im moving out.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
No more. You can't have nice things, and vodka is a nice thing.
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
My mother just made an innapropriate gesture with a cucumber while grocery shopping at whole foods... Then she said "bitches love cucumbers" and all this time i thought i was adopted
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
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