No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
I just found a bag of teeth...
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Nobody on Tinder wants to give you a Blumpkin.
Randomize
