Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
Randomize
