so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
Just had a nice conversation with my landlord while cleaning your puke off my car
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
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