okay pat passed out under dana's car
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
I filled this oven with as much Pizza as I could, and I've been eating out of it for three days.
Just ate the last piece. Refilling the oven.
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The kind of drunk where you put two tampons in thinking that it'll last me longer ...
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
Randomize