no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
If anyone could figure out how to pee on someone's soul, it would be you.
You always know what to say to make me feel better.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
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