Come here. I'm drunk. Family Function. Intense Pro-life vs. Pro-choice debate. Bring Republicans.
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
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