Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
I had to convince you not to write "happy birthday to the first guy who fingered me" on his facebook wall, right above the post from his current girlfriend's mother.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize
