My eyes are so dilated i literally have night vision right now.
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
Randomize
