No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
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I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
I think vodka/water/skittles totally beats your crystal light mimosas
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
Fuck off. Since when do you love him??
Since he licked my arm to retrieve the macaroni and cheese he dropped. You have to appreciate that
Can't even lie. Mad respect
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
When you called me I said did you make it home. You said yeah. Then you said you didn't know where you were. I said you were at home and you said but where. I said you are in the bathroom. Then you said oh, you're so smart lol
Randomize
