He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
Randomize
