Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
You went to the wrong car, tried to open the locked door, and started crying because you thought we were playing a mean trick. Then the owner came...
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
What part of i'm handcuffed to an oven do you not understand?
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
Randomize
