I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
im at a party in sweatpants, slippers, and a basketball jersey from the eighth grade, 10 bucks says im still getting laid
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is a 1000000% chance you'll be turned down if you try coming on to me while I watch Star Wars.
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
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