He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
my roommate just caught me washing a dildo in the sink.
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
"Being an adult" and "being happy" are two circles that do not overlap in my Venn diagram of life.
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
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