Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
You know we had a good night last night when today I opened up my Google Translate application and the language is set to Persian and the phrase to translate is "I want you to suck my dick".
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
Randomize
