i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
I just had to explain to the pharmacy cashier that the Plan B and thank you notes I was buying were not related.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
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