I wish i was in the wii world.
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
I looked at her and said "I now pronounce you pumpkin tits"
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
Maybe walking up to the cops busting our party with a "Things go better with Coke" t-shirt on and asking for my extra license back that my little brother got busted with wasn't the best idea of the night.
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
like, you weren't just lying there, you were wrapped in what appeared to be the skin of a wolf, chanting doomsday prophecies
THE END IS NEIGH
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
Randomize
