Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
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