so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
This guy kept trying to use "see? I'm clean. Cleared by the plasma place today." as a pick up line. This is not okay.
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
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