his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
We interrupt your regularly scheduled Saturday morning programming with this important announcement: you are not the father. I repeat not the father. Congratulations and have a nice day.
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
You were trust falling into bushes
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
Randomize
