So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
Sometimes I wonder if we could be friends if we lived closer.
Define "chronic" masturbator.
She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature
Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
Randomize
