watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
My bed is full of blood and feathers
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
A million fucking miles away, and the sun still manages to fuck my hungover mornings up.
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
Randomize