I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
Why did every guy I have ever slept with have to come into the library today?
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
Better skin, bigger boobs.. Birth control is INCREASING my chance of getting pregnant because people actually want to have sex with me now.
Life is so much better after having sex.
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
Randomize
