So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
I was pretty stoned. I thought I needed a seatbelt at the restaurant.
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
Hi. This might be awkward, but I met you on saturday at about 330 am. I have to admit I don't remember your name, what we talked about, or various details of how I got home. What I do remember is that I was invested enough in getting your number to ask my cab driver for a pen to write it down since my phone was dead. So do you want to meet, soberer, some time?
Hey bro I think you got the wrong number I'm a dude
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
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