dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
When he couldn't get it up, he handed me a beer, put his clothes back on, and said "try again tomorrow."
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
Randomize
