im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
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