yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
It's not weird mascara. I just have puke crusted on my eyelashes.
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
It was his birthday this weekend. I had to carry him 6 blocks, in 3 inch heels. The entire time he was trying to molest me, eat my face, and try to stop every two feet to tie his shoe. He would light a cigarette, forget about it, almost burn everyone, throw it out, then decide he wanted to smoke. He kept repeating that he trusts me with his life.
...Wow...
I could be a kindergarten teacher
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
Randomize
